As usual everything I do is all or nothing. I have had a few years break from the gym for various reasons, all valid reasons I might add, and yes I did have a doctors certificate to prove it!
Usually when I sign up for a gym membership, the days that follow find me making every excuse under the sun why I can’t go today.
“I won’t be back in time for my client”
I’ll get all sweaty and I won’t have time to wash my hair before work”
“I need to do some housework”
“I don’t like the classes on today, so I’ll definitely go tomorrow”
I wake in the night and I find myself worrying about what I have just done, signed up for a whole 12 months of EXERCISE!
I have to say though I am back to my old self, enjoying the gym and the classes, my favourite RPM or spin or for the average person sitting on a stationary bike, in a dark room with about 20 other people all wearing bike pants, going up and down imaginary mountains with a size 6 fitness leader at the front screaming at you to “LOAD UP YOUR GEARS, YOU WON’T LOSE THAT FAT STOMACH IF YOU DON’T LOAD UP!!”
She had me at fat stomach...she hit me where it hurt and I know she aimed that at me, no I am not being paranoid, this little Hitler in bike pants actually looked my way when she made that comment, and I swear I saw a smirk just in the very corner of her mouth!
My little legs (well really long legs) are going round faster than a hamster in his wheel, and this hamster has had red bull with an extra caffeine shot in his drip feeder not water. At this point I am absolutely exhausted, sweat pouring off my face, face as red as a beetroot and she says “Only 4 more sets to go!” WTF!!
This girl has not had 4 children, a hysterectomy and haemorrhoids , I can pretty much guarantee this. Anyway I finished the class, ignored the little Hitler when she called out “enjoy the rest of your day loser”, ok I added the loser bit! I then actually managed to walk to the car but I am now waiting for a consultation to see a plastic surgeon so I can have my vagina sewn back together.
I am on my way to better fitness...yes I am!